INCONCLUSIVE!

Not what I wanted to hear, but it’s better then hearing definitive bad news.

I’m going to lighten this up a tad now people. This is a food and fitness blog, and obviously I haven’t done a hell of a lot of exercise

So, the Fugu post got people talking about odd food. My cousin mentioned chitterlings, more commonly pronounced as “chitlins.” I have to agree with her. There’s plenty of just plain awful foods, like haggis, or that Italian dish that’s basically a sheep’s head cleaved in half and there you go. Have at it.

I think, people forget sometimes that when people are hungry, they will eat a lot of weird shit, basically because that’s all there is! Have you never been home and been hungry and it’s late or you plain old don’t want to go to the store or you’re too damn broke and you get paid tomorrow so why can’t I eat a meal of toast, an orange, a little dry cereal, and eleven grapes? We’ve all done it.

I have eaten what some people would consider strange food, even while avoiding things that most people consider me patently insane for not liking. If you know me, you know I am of course, referring to cheese, the Devil’s own favorite. I hate cheese like Hitler!* I hate cheese like I hate cancer. I hate cheese like I hate the Jennifer Lopez song “Jenny From the Block.”

Actually, that’s not strictly true because “Jenny from the Block” makes me want to hatchet-murder someone. I hate that song with such fervent vitriol that I literally see red when that song comes on, and thankfully people seem to have forgotten it because I can not be responsible for my action when it's on. I won't eat cheese, but it doesn't make me mad or anything.

Anyway, back to strange food. What were people thinking with some of this stuff...I mean, head cheese? Who decided that that looked good? How damn hungry do you have to be before you see your first lobster and think “I’m going to put bits of that giant sea-roach in my mouth! That might be good…”? Monkey brains!?!?! Prairie Oysters?!?!?! I don’t want to eat anything something thinks or makes babies with, nossir.

I mean, I understand people who don’t have much will use every part of an animal that’s edible. I get that. That does not mean it’s a “delicacy” for real. I mean, I’m pretty sure if I were starving and I got handed a plate of, oh I dunno, squirrel nuggets or something, I’d be more than happy to chow down.**

Like I was saying before, I have had odd food. Amongst those items some folks might call strange:

*Ostrich
*Wild boar
*Rattlesnake
*Alligator
*Buffalo/Bison
*Beaver***

I have enjoyed all of the above.

So, what’s the strangest thing you’ve actually eaten? Leave a comment and we’ll discuss this on Monday.




*What? Don’t look at me like that! Hitler was a bad guy, it’s OK to hate him, honest.
** Like I have always said, you can probably choke damn near anything down with a good enough selection of dippin’ sauces.
*** I’m sorry, I had to. You’ll forgive me. See below...

Waiting for a call...

So, I had pretty positive reactions to my Fugu rant the other day, but a couple of you were a little testy.

See what I did there?

Anyway, today’s the day we find out mom’s test results. I didn’t think I was so nervous, my tummy says otherwise. Hitting my three pound goal next week seems likely, but at the expense of a nervous stomach.

BIGGEST LOSER-

I’ll be honest here, I’m pretty upset they sent Dan home on Biggest Loser, mainly because I liked him a lot, and wanted to see him take it. It was heartwarming to see him and his friend look so much thinner. Hell, he lost over a hundred pounds so far. His partner only in the 40s, and while that’s a great difference, it was his lackadaisical attitude that got Dan sent home. I wanted the father and son team to stay too. It was a hard elimination because, let’s face it, they were all nice guys, they all need to be there (although Dan has been proving he can do it at home!) and there was no jerk or game player that needed to be sent home. Joelle escapes the axe again, although for maybe the first time, deservedly so.

Let’s face it, it was also a tough elimination because everyone put up more than respectable numbers. We’ve seen a few like this in past seasons as well, but never to the point where I don’t want either contestant to go home.

Also, does anyone else think that it’s bullshit that there are two teams, and the rest are individuals? I’m thinking next week or the week after it’s every man for themselves!

Week 33: 252.9

Week 33: 252.9

Starting weight: 264.2
Weight last week: 255.5
Current weight: 252.9
Lost this week: 2.6
Total lost to date: 11.3
Goal for this week: 3 pounds

Goal Weight: 180

Weight remaining to lose: 75.3


Allrighty, the 250 mark is well within sight right now! I’d like to knock that out this week which is why I pegged a three pound goal there. I’m not gonna make a big whoopee about passing 10 pounds because I’d like it to stick.

To those of you wondering about my mom, we should actually hear something on Thursday. It’s been a rough couple of weeks what with them living so far away and all.

My wife made the best fat free blueberry muffins last week, and I still have one all wrapped up and ready for eatin’. I’m pretty psyched about it actually. This is what I have been reduced to, or rather, what I am trying to reduce myself to, tee hee and all that…

And now, on the lighter side of the news, sort of…

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,483504,00.html

TOKYO — Seven diners in northern Japan fell ill and three remained hospitalized Tuesday after eating blowfish testicles prepared in a restaurant not authorized to serve the poisonous delicacy.

The owner of the restaurant in Tsuruoka city, who is also the chef, had no license to serve blowfish and was being questioned on suspicion of professional negligence, police official Yoshihito Iwase said.

Blowfish, while extremely poisonous if not prepared properly, is considered a delicacy in Japan and is consumed by thrill-seeking gourmets.

Iwase said the seven men ordered sashimi and grilled blowfish testicles at the restaurant Monday night.

Shortly after, they developed limb paralysis and breathing trouble and started to lose consciousness — typical signs of blowfish poisoning — and were rushed to a hospital for treatment, Iwase said.

A 68-year-old diner remained hospitalized in critical condition with respiratory failure and two others, aged 55 and 69, were in serious condition, he said.

"It's scary. If you go to a decent-looking restaurant that serves fugu, you would assume a cook has a proper fugu license," Iwase said, using the Japanese term for blowfish.

Blowfish poison, called tetrodotoxin, is nearly 100 times more poisonous than potassium cyanide, according to the Ishikawa Health Service Association. It can cause death within an hour and a half after consumption.

Three people died and 44 others were sickened by blowfish poisoning in 2007 — most of them after catching the fish and cooking it at home — according to the Health Ministry.




OK, look at that thing. You wanna eat a weird looking fish, go for it I suppose. But, uh, if I were you guys, I’d lay off the poisonous fish balls, huh? I mean, really! Fugu must be the most astounding taste ever that the human race has ever tasted. If someone told me, “Hey, Rich, we’re gonna eat the best thing ever tonight, I’m telling you, it’s awesome!” I’d be pretty psyched until they got to the part where they said, “yeah, but uh, FYI, if the cook botches the prep there’s a fair chance that it’s going to kill you…” and this is before you break the news to me that part of the meal consists of something's balls.

I mean, let’s look at a few facts, all right? OK, first: I’m not eating fish balls. Second, I’m not eating any balls whatsoever, nein danke! Third: I thought we were going out for a nice meal, not on some twisted game show or to get marooned on an island or something. I have an idea! How about we go get hibachi and you can soak your shirt in kerosene in the back lot before the guy makes the onion volcano* if you want danger there, Evil Kenivil.

Here’s another question, and I realize this is an “indelicate” one, but how does one prepare blowfish nards for consumption? I can see these particular daredevils got them grilled, but...How big can they possibly be?

You know what? Never mind, I don’t think I want to know.


* Seriously, how freaking great is the onion volcano? It’s the highlight of the whole show, and I am including any food launching in that.

Sometimes, you just don't care...

You just need to eat some comfort food. The ironic thing about comfort food is, for the most part, eventually you’re pants are too tight, and you can’t get comfortable!

I’m worried today. My mom is due back some test results and I am, to be honest, slightly concerned. So yeah, I ate badly this morning, which didn’t really help, because now I’m anxious and bloated.

So, if you read this, cross your fingers for my mom, or pray for her, or do a little dance, or whatever it is you do to send good vibes someone’s way.

I have no clever title for my blog today...

...however, someone did ask me before: “Hey, I didn’t look, but did you ever manage to get it up yesterday?”

Sigh.

Some days, they pitch ‘em over the plate so perfectly it seems a shame to let ‘em go like that, but you do what you have to do to not end up in HR, right?

So, as I was doing some laundry last night I missed a hunk of Biggest Loser last night. I was shocked to see Damien get voted off while that reprehensible slag Joelle got a reprieve! I know many people voted because her partner really wants this, but Joelle has made it pretty clear she does not want to be there. After Damien was voted off she was crying and all I could think was “You’re crying because you have to bust you ass for another week!”

Damien, on the other hand, did awesome at home.

Joelle is the new Vickie and I can't stand the sight of her. Ugh.

Oh, I also submitted some very overdue Epinions.com reviews today that I had finished some time ago.

The Tomorrow People Set 1 (which for some reason is not showing up in my profile. I submitted this before the Time Flight one too, so go figure.)
http://www.epinions.com/review/mvie_mu-1143817/content_458512502404

Doctor Who- Time Flight
http://www.epinions.com/review/mvie_mu-1105811/content_458513157764

My other reviews
http://www.epinions.com/user-richco/sec_~public_profile_opinion_list/show_~content/pp_~1/pa_~1

Why not stop by and kill some time meandering through my very cluttered brain?

Week 32: 255.5!

Starting weight: 264.2
Weight last week: 257.0
Current weight: 255.5
Lost this week: 1.5
Total lost to date: 8.7
Goal for this week: 2 pounds

Goal Weight: 180

Weight remaining to lose: 77.9

OK, 1.5 down, but considering the amount of quality time I spent in the, erm, “Library” since Thursday I was actually surprised I hadn’t lost more. My stomach’s been all sorts of out of sorts for about a week now. I haven’t thrown up or anything, and I have certainly been worse off in the “other department” if I may be so delicate. I'm going to name this pound and a half "Duncan" because it seems to yo-yo back and forth on me...

Man, I have pretty disgusted with myself lately. I have regressed into an unmotivated slob again, and it really pisses me off. I don’t have to tell you I didn’t go to the gym like I wanted to last week. Mind you, I was feeling kind of crummy, but I felt pretty good Saturday, and I should have really tried harder.

I told my wife I want to try going to bed a little earlier at night, because, I have been told, “the sleep you get before midnight is the most important.” I have also heard “Never go to bed the same day you are getting up.” These are not 100% true, of course. Basically, it should read “go to bed when you are tired.”

I know that sounds pretty damned obvious, but buy, you’d be surprised. How many times do we push ourselves for no apparent reason? I mean, I frequently have stayed up to the point of being damned near incoherent to finish watching a television show. Now, to add insult to injury this is something I own on DVD a lot of times. It’ll be there tomorrow, go to bed. My wife would frequently fall asleep and sometimes I’d watch something else (sometimes a complete film! Nothing too long, frequently one of the shorter B&W films she’s not so into but, still!) or go online. It’s a dumb habit, to be sure.

Anyway, in other news my mom went to the ER because she’s been having trouble walking for a couple days. My Dad finally convinced her to go to the ER because she’s stubborn. Hell, she’s Irish and has some Polish, you bet she’s a stubborn woman! My Dad is stubborn too. I am stubborn like a Goddamn Anchor of Stubborn* when I want to be! Anyway, they go and lo and behold her hip has a slight fracture!

I kid you not.

So, she had some pins installed (or is having them installed as I write this) and she will probably be home by Thursday. That’s pretty nutty. She said they told her it was a 20 minute procedure. That’s just mindboggling to me. Wow. I guess if you’re gonna put a crack in your hip, Florida’s the place to do it.

It’s a little scary being an adult and watching your parents get old. I mean, my folks are up there. They are not ancient mind you, but they are not spring chickens. It gets me thinking of my own health and mortality and it scares the ever-lovin’ crud out of me.

So, anyway, forgive me if I am rambling, but this has been a hell of a day for me.

See you tomorrow.



* "Goddamn Anchor of Stubborn" is a trademarked name, like "Elvish Cloak of Invisibility" or "Dwarven Hammer of Smacking." Very D&D!

Seriously, how can you not love bacon?

Sorry for the break, I was feeling pretty crummy from last Thursday on...

back to business!

As I was saying,

I love bacon. There, I said it. I'm not ashamed! I love bacon almost with an indecent fervor, normally reserved by men for sports teams, beer and a large chest. Now, I can take or leave sports, I love a nice pint now and again, and well, you know…

Anyway, I was making myself a turkey bacon (while not “true” bacon, it’s still pretty damned good!) sandwich the other day and saw the nutritional info on the back of the package. I was like “WOW! This is insanely good!” I though like almost a quarter of what I was expecting. I was excited, actually. Then I looked at the serving size: One Piece.

One Piece?!?!? One piece?

Come on, seriously? One piece of bacon? That’s like, damned near impossible. It’s a buffet with one item, it’s a beauty contest with one entrant. Fellow bacon lovers: Have you ever eaten only one piece of bacon, ever? Are you even capable of eating one piece? I mean, OK, if there was only one piece available, sure. Maybe the person you’re dining with asks “do you want this last piece of bacon, I am too full to consume it’s deliciousness after unwisely filling up on…well, anything else, really…?” then yeah, you might eat one piece.

I guess what I’m saying here can be summarized in the following bullet points:

• I love Bacon
• Bacon is Nummy(tm)
• I cannot eat a small portion of bacon once I start eating any bacon whatsoever
• In retrospect, my transformation into a colossal fat ass should not have been as much of a surprise as it was to me.

Keeping it real! Real fake, that is...

http://consumerist.com/5127945/identical-fake-testimonial-diet-sites-spreading-like-herpes
http://consumerist.com/5123930/careful-those-free-acai-products-might-come-attached-to-a-delicious-scam


Check that out. It seems there’s a veritable butt-load of fake weight loss blogs out there designed to make you part company with your dough! Now, some of you may argue that this is a fake weight loss site due to the fact that I really have not lost a heck of a lot of weight, but at least I am not trying to scam you out of money.

That said, if you wanted to throw me a few shekels out of love or pity or something, I’m certainly not gonna tell you “no!”

Everyone wants our fattybux! McDonald’s and their ilk keeps you fat, and these acai berry chiselers want to rip us off because a lot of want to be thin.

The gym wants your money regardless. Fat, skinny, there or not. They are at least consistent, right?


Oh, they sent home Jerry on Biggest Loser. I liked Jerry but holy mackerel did he do great at home! He lost like 70 pounds! He looks phenomenal! Good for you, sir! Bob’s freakout on the silver team woman (Joelle?) was absolutely insane! Wow! She probably would have been off had Dan not gotten the 1 pound penalty this week. My guess is that she will be gone next week.

Week 31: 257! Again! This is not really a complaint!

Starting weight: 264.2
Weight last week: 257.0
Current weight: 257.0
Lost this week: 0 (but hey, no gain!)
Total lost to date: 7.2
Goal for this week: 2 pounds

Goal Weight: 180

Weight remaining to lose: 79.4


An uneventful week, weight wise. I'm just glad there was no upswing, you know?

I really want to get back to the gym. Yeah, I’ve gone a total of once since my impassioned post some time back. I miss the gym, but man, it is hard as hell to get there. You work full time, you have a kid (or bless you that have more than one!), you have things to do around the house, how in the world do you do it?

I used to do it by getting up at 5:30 and going then. I just can’t seem to drag my carcass out of bed that early and if I do, I can’t seem to muster the get and go to actually get up and go to the effing place. I know if I do it for three weeks (just three weeks. It’s a laughably short amount of time) it’d be a habit, but it’s the going in the first place.

I understand why people give up. It’s much easier to just stop trying. I won’t tell you it doesn’t cross my mind. Then I look at my wife and son and I get so sodding angry with myself because they are so important to me, and yet I can’t seem to get by with a little less sleep, a little more inconvenience.

Would it really be easier to stop, though?

Would it be easier to just get remarkably fat? Like “I need to be pulled from the apartment by a crane/fused to my sofa” fat?

Would it be easier to just have a heart attack or a stroke?

Would it be easier to get Diabetes?

I think we all know the answer to this, right? I know what I’m supposed to be doing, I know what I need to be doing.

As it looks this week, I should be able to go on Friday morning. Right now, Wednesday and Thursday are booked up. I figure if I can go Friday through Monday this week it should start getting easier, at least the going part, anyway.

Monday, Monday! (bah-dah! Bah-dah-dah...) No good to me...

Woof. What a dog of a night. At about 10 PM, the Short Man barfed a spectacular combination of chicken nuggets, juice, bananas and brownies all over the bed and pillows last night. Oh, I should mention his crib had been recalled for safety issues recently, so he threw up all over his new sleepytime H.Q., our bed. Yep. Poor little dude woke up crying so I went into the bedroom to try and comfort him, figuring he’d had a bad dream and then I smelled it. I turned on the light and he was sitting in the middle of the bed just…

It was mayhem, is what it was. Poor little bear was sitting there looking like Tara Reid in Carter’s pajamas surrounded by the most heinous perimeter of vomit. The missus and I threw him in the tub, while I stripped the bed. Luckily he didn’t get any of the blankets. So we lost some good pillows, and one of those foam wedges that was pretty well shot anyhow.

So we set up the air mattress in his room and he insisted we both had to lay with him until he fell asleep. I managed to extract myself slowly from the floor and head to the A&P to get some barf cleaner and baking soda. I pull up to the store and there’s a sign that they now close at 11PM Sunday. BASTARDS!!!!!!!!

I ended up going to the Pathmark and got what I needed. When I came home, the lad had thrown up again, but this time only got the comforters. So I threw one in the wash and one in a bag to be washed (I didn’t have enough quarters!) and because our driers pretty much suck at our apartment complex, it wasn’t done until 3:10AM. In the meantime I cleaned up our mattress, ate some cookies (because, quite frankly I knew the gym was out so really, what the hell did I care at that point?) dozed fitfully on the couch (under my sweatjacket like I was on a park bench) because I kept getting up to check on the wife and kid, or run over to the laundry room all the while half watching and listening to old episodes of Dragnet. I finally passed out for good at about 3:30.

Owen woke up at 6:30 and thankfully I got to go lay on the Aero Bed until 8-ish, but it was a fitful doze as well.

On the way to work today I saw one of those Chinook helicopters flying over the road. It was really, really cool. However, now more than ever, I need to ask: How in the world does that thing actually fly!?!?! Having seen it in action for the first time in real life today it actually looked like it had less business being in the air once it was actually up, than in pictures I have seen of the blasted things on the ground! Don’t get me wrong, I understand, to a point, what makes helicopters fly. But these things look so unwieldy and goofy that I have to wonder how they work.

Five for five! Are you happy now, Miss Opperlee?

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/people_like_food


I mean, come on! Who doesn’t like food!?!?!?



Am I right?

I just wanted to post 5 things this week, as well as include an in-joke for a co-worker.

Mission accomplished.*




Hey! I made it a link!

If we can put a man on the moon, why not Sesame Chicken in the cupboard?

I know I wanted to talk about the new Season of The Biggest Loser, and I will, but I need to get something off my chest first.

I have been trying to bring lunch to work, whether it’s a sandwich or a frozen meal like that awesome Kashi one I talked about some time back. I also keep emergency rations in my cupboard for, well, emergencies. Soup, cereal, some Kashi and Nutrigrain bars and usually one Healthy Choice Fresh Mixers™ meal. Now, here’s the weird thing, doesn’t it wig anyone else out that you don’t have to keep a Sesame Chicken meal refrigerated? Anyone?

I realize it’s probably the same Space-Age Technology that brought us Tang, Teflon and the Sham-Wow, but it makes me uneasy, despite it’s deliciousness. The Sesame Chicken is indeed quite yummy, there’s some pineapple and water chestnuts as well (which we can now add to bananas and almonds in the “Foods I didn’t know I liked” list) and it’s pretty filling. With coupons they run about two bucks or so, and that’s pretty fair for a meal. I just find food with meat in it that you do not have to store cold slightly distressing.

Anyway, on to The Biggest Loser. Like Bob and Jillian, I was astounded at the sheer size of the contestants this time out. I mean, the two best friends (something like 19 & 24 years old) weigh in at a combined 847 pounds. Holy smokes, that’s absolutely insane! I mean that’s 3.3 of me.

Well. That’s pretty sobering on my end, isn’t it? I mean at least it’s almost three and a half of me, but I’ll be much happier at my goal weight when that will be closer to five of me.

That number seems insane to me, aside from being the area code for the suburbs of Chicago, but that’s two very young dudes to be that big. I mean, I feel lousy and everything at my weight, I can’t imagine another 175 pounds on top of that. I like the kid so far, he seems like a easy going dude and fun and funny to boot. When teams were being picked he said something along the lines of “We’ll we’ve all been the fat kid picked last in gym. Now, we’re all the fat kids in like, the fattest gym class ever!”

I can’t wait to see Bob flip out on the lady from the silver team next week!

My guess is Dan takes it.

Oh, and is it me or have the old guys in the last three seasons all been named “Jerry?”*





* I just checked. Last season’s old guy was Jerry, and so was season 4’s old guy. They other old guy was Lynn. Season three had no old guy.

Hey, Tubby! Knock off all that exersice! Really! (No, not really!)

I have to thank My Pal Janet (her new official title!) for today’s blog fodder. She’s good for that!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28524942/

Diet, not exercise, plays key role in weight loss
Study: Better nutrition trumps physical activity in avoiding obesity

By LiveScience Staff
updated 1:46 p.m. ET, Tues., Jan. 6, 2009

Physical activity has many proven benefits.

It strengthens bones and muscles, improves mental health and mood, lowers blood pressure, improves cholesterol levels and reduces the risk of cardiovascular disease, diabetes, breast cancer and colon cancer. Exercise is also good for your brain.

It may not be a cure-all for obesity, however.

Though better nutrition coupled with exercise has long been the favored prescription for losing weight and avoiding obesity, a new study suggests diet actually plays the key role.

Researchers from Loyola University Health System and other centers compared African American women in metropolitan Chicago with women in rural Nigeria. On average, the Chicago women weighed 184 pounds and the Nigerian women weighed 127 pounds.

Researchers had expected to find that the slimmer Nigerian women would be more physically active. To their surprise, they found no significant difference between the two groups in the amount of calories burned during physical activity.

"Decreased physical activity may not be the primary driver of the obesity epidemic," said Loyola nutritionist Amy Luke, a member of the study team.

U.S. government guidelines state that each week, adults need at least 2 ½ hours of moderate aerobic activity (such as brisk walking) or 75 minutes of vigorous activity (such as jogging). Adults also should do muscle-strengthening activities, such as weight-lifting or sit-ups, at least twice a week.

The benefits to overall health are clear. Exercise has even been shown to improve kids' academic performance.

Burn more, eat more
People burn more calories when they exercise. Thing is, they compensate by eating more, said Richard Cooper, co-author of the study and chairman of the Department of Preventive Medicine and Epidemiology.

"We would love to say that physical activity has a positive effect on weight control, but that does not appear to be the case," Cooper said.

Diet is a more likely explanation than physical activity expenditure for why Chicago women weigh more than Nigerian women, Luke said. She noted the Nigerian diet is high in fiber and carbohydrates and low in fat and animal protein. By contrast, the Chicago diet is 40 percent to 45 percent fat and high in processed foods.

More research seems to be needed, however, as the new finding conflicts with other studies. A study in the September issue of the journal Archives of Internal Medicine found that Old Order Amish people who had a gene related to obesity stayed thin nonetheless because they exercised a lot.

Yet results of the new study are similar to those of a 2007 study of men and women in Jamaica. Researchers from Loyola and other centers found there was no association between weight gain and calories burned during physical activity.

"Evidence is beginning to accumulate that dietary intake may be more important than energy expenditure level," Luke said. "Weight loss is not likely to happen without dietary restraint."

The results, announced in a statement from the university today, were published in the September 2008 issue of the journal Obesity.

Other centers involved in the study include University of Ibadan in Nigeria, Howard University, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health and University of Wisconsin.

(This article is reprinted without permission for commentary purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended. All right reserved)

Well, yeah...

The key to remember about all of this, before you decide to quit going to the gym, is this: Diet is key for avoiding obesity. That is correct, avoiding obesity. As in, making sure you don’t become obese. Sure, that's direct from the Bureau of Common Effing Sense, you would think. If you are athletic you can eat like a savage until you get out of college or slow down and get a desk job. Conversely, if you were like me and not athletic at all unless it involved a swimming pool in the summer or running (driving) to the record store, but ate like I was training to get the Gold in "Men's Freestyle Buffet" in the Olympics, it means a lot more work further down the road.

If you are already a giant fat ass*, you need to get the weight off. Let’s face it, you didn’t get to the point you’re at now eating apples and celery. OK, maybe if they were baked into a pie and stuffing respectively, sure. Anyway, the weight loss process, like a tortoise on Viagra, is hard and slow. Exercise will speed it up, regardless (to a point!) of what you are eating.

Let’s look at a few things I take umbrage with in this article, shall we?

<<<"Evidence is beginning to accumulate that dietary intake may be more important than energy expenditure level," Luke said. "Weight loss is not likely to happen without dietary restraint." >>>

Really? So if I go to Krispy Kreme and spackle my cake-hole shut with delicious, hot donuts and exercise moderately, I won’t lose weight? Of course not, you ignoramus!

To lose weight you must burn more calories than you take in. Plain and simple, and this article doesn’t really deny that. Let’s get some perspective, kids. You’re not going to burn off the average American diet by leading a sedentary lifestyle. The Flash, maybe, could do it, maybe in one of those issues where he races Superman around the world or something**, but you sitting at home in your tighty-whiteys playing Sonic the Hedgehog will not.

<<diet actually plays the key role. >>>

Wow, really? Again, these folks seem to be shooting for the Nobel Prize in the “No Duh!” Science division.

So what I’m saying, basically, “keep on keepin’ on!”

Endnote:
I was going to talk about the new season of The Biggest Loser that started last night, but I’ll do that in my next installment. We’ve already had some surprises and the biggest team ever to be on the show. I am truly scared for some of these people.

It will be interesting to see where this goes.





* and I say this describing myself, thank you.
** And how come Superman and the Flash had to always tie for first? OK, yeah, Superman is "Faster Than a Speeding Bullet" and all, but so is The Flash. In fact, the Flash is "The Fastest Man Alive!" I mean, that seems pretty straightforward to me. Unless it's because "The Fastest Man Alive Other Than that Smug Berk Superman, Of Course" would look admittedly shitty on the cover of your comic book.

Week 30: 257

Starting weight: 264.2
Weight last week: 256.0
Current weight: 257.0
Lost this week: 0 (up 1)
Total lost to date: 7.2
Goal for this week: 2 pounds

Goal Weight: 180

Weight remaining to lose: 79.4


I’m OK with a pound up this week. All things considered, coming out of the Eating Season (Thanksgiving- New Year) having not surpassed my starting weight is OK with me. It’s a new year and we’re back in the swing of things.

Hike!

Transitional Pants

I’ve been milking two pair of jeans for along while, until I can get into the plethora of brandy new size 38 jeans hanging in my closet. So, I have two pair or Wrangler jeans and have recently discovered, much to my chagrin, they are just not cutting it anymore. Let me tell you why:

Pair 1: The “bad pair” or the “weekenders.” The Weekenders have a hole in the right knee so big that makes me look like I should be plying second guitar in Nirvana. One of the belt loops has come off and there are now holes developing in the other knee and over the pockets. They are very nearly visibly disintegrating while I wear them*. Oh, the right front pocket has a hole in it too boot making it useless for holding change or anything but much more convenient for any emergency “adjustments” that I might need to make during the course of my day, so there’s that.. So, you win some, you lose some, right?

Pair 2: The “good pair.” Now I’m using the term “good pair” really loosely here. There’s a really small stain, and now I appear to be wearing through the left knee. There's a worn spot about the size of a quarter. You know your pants are in bad shape when you go to scratch your knee and come away with denim fibers under your nails.


So, I said to my wife, “it appears I am in need of a pair of Bridge Pants.” You know, a cheap pair to tide me over until the Epoch of the 38” Waist begins. So, with The Boy in tow I made the trek to the local Wally World and went on a Trouser Safari** in search of a new pair of pants.

I found exactly 1 pair of jeans in my size (40x30, which isn’t really my size, but try and find 40x29 pants. Like a needle in a stack of other needles!). Wrangler, of course. What annoys me is there are plenty of 38x30, and 44x30 all the way up to, 55x30! Wow.

You know, as fat as I feel, that’s pretty brutal. Although if I actually wore my pants around my belly, I bet I’d be up there for sure.

What’s really annoying is Walmart has their own brand of jeans and they are only 8 bucks***! Alas, no 40x30…


BLOOD TEST RESULTS!

Oh, I forgot! I don’t have the actual numbers anymore (they were thrown out by accident) but the overall Cholesterol was close to normal. My Triglycerides are a goddamn nightmare right now, so I’m adding yet another pill to my arsenal. I also need to raise my good cholesterol numbers. However, I’ve had worse numbers for sure.





* Sorry for that mental image, everyone.
** Well…that sounds just awful doesn’t it? Sheesh. I'm two for two today!
*** Oh, I'm sorry! Did you forget I am cheap???

You say you want a Res-o-luuuuu-tion!

So, here's my 100th post, and fittingly, it's my new years resolutions:

#1) Get Out of Debt (this will be accomplished via a combo of second job/tightening of spending/and selling excess stuff). I didn't really need the economy to end up in the crapper to realize this is a priority, but it certainly was one. Accomplishing this will make a huge difference in my life.

#2) Make genuine progress losing weight. I’d like to be close to my halfway point by August. Rededicate myself to myself I guess you can say. I need to stop being lazy, and get of my ass and just do it. No more excuses.

#3) Be more positive. Things get to me far too easily, and quite frankly, they shouldn't. It's not teaching my son how to effectively deal with life's little setbacks. Mind you, it was a somewhat trying year, but I need to think positively.

#4) Not be online so much, unless it's for specific purposes of fulfilling #1. I spend too much time just dicking around on the internet for no reason. There's tons of things I could be doing online to improve myself or my situation, but I tend to congregate on message boards and Facebook instead of taking some courses or something.

#5) Finally sell off the remaining inventory/remnants of my toy collection. This will partially declutter the garage, and partially help me accomplish #1 as well. I'm also trying to get off of Ebay with their now criminal level of fees and stupid rules and find a new venue to make some cash at. Any tips?

#6) Write more epinions.com reviews. I enjoy writing them and hey, a little cash is better than not getting any, right?

#7) Be more sensitve to my Lovely Assitant because, to tell you the truth, I can be a cad.

So there you have it. 2009. Everyday is Judgement Day. Everytime i get up in the morning I have a chance to be better than I was the day before. It's going to be hard, but I am not giving up, because I did that for too goddamn long already.

Let's kick 2009 right in the nuts, shall we?