Week 45: 252.0 over again.

Starting weight: 264.2
Weight last week: 252.0
Current weight: 252.0
Lost this week: 0
Total lost to date: 12.2

Goal for this week: 2 pounds

Goal Weight: 180
Weight remaining to lose: 69* pounds

All right, maintaining. That's pretty good. I mean I really can't complain about not gaining, right?

I'm having a stressful morning, though. My son has to go to school and he will not eat. I have to take my lunch early today (11:30) to get him and take him to the sitter. I'm all wound up, as usual. I'm having a lot of trouble just relaxing a little bit these days. I simply feel like there's oh! so much to be done, and half the time I am frozen in indecision. Ugh.

I see the week number get closer and closer to the 1 year anniversary of the Sporty by Forty Initiative and I get more and more discouraged. I seem to have done nothing of note, I have less get up and go, I seem to only be stagnant.

I though that after my Mom's passing I might have a clearer head and things might fall a little more into place. That was pretty goddamn naive, huh? If anything, it's crazier. I'm nervous and anxious, and although I knew this is normal, I can't stand it.

Man, now I have a headache.