Week 41: 255.1 and we're calling it a minor victory. Come see why...

Starting weight: 264.2
Weight last week: 254.1
Current weight: 255.1
Lost this week: +1
Total lost to date: 9.1
Goal for this week: 2 pounds

Goal Weight: 180

Weight remaining to lose: 75.1

1 pound. That's pretty remarkable.

Let’s consider my weekend. I flew into West Palm Beach on Friday at about 6:30. My mom is in hospice right now. She has terminal lung cancer, and is in a hospice facility. There was much running around to be done, helping my dad with stuff, and visiting mom and whatnot.

Like I said before, I ate on the crappy side of shitty all weekend. It was comfort food I guess.

On the other hand, seeing my mom, dying of something she might have been able to prevent, has lit a fire under my ass. I simply cannot put Owen through something like this where he has to see his old man like that. So the comfort of “comfort food” is somewhat short lived, which I realized is exactly what I will be.

Anyway, Mom is…well, she’s OK. She’s pretty pissed off about the whole thing, and so am I. When I think about the things we won’t be able to share anymore, it really pisses me off and I get very angry and sad.

She’s never going to be able to go outside and look at the stars again. She’s never going to get a phone call from her grandson. She’ll never see the rest of the Harry Potter movies that she liked so much.

It’s not fair, and it just eats me alive to think about. She wanted to retire to Florida and got barely 4 years in her paradise before she gets robbed of it, and we get robbed of her. Owen will not know his Nan, and will not appreciate the level of ridiculous spoilage he was due as sole Grandson. His Nan spoiled the crap out of him, but he’ll only know it because we’ll tell him.

Seriously, fuck cigarettes.

I flew back into Jersey and got back home at 11:45 PM last night. Jeez, what a day…what a weekend…what a year so far.